I also thought of titling this discussion, "Proper Etiquette when dealing with Witches - How Not to Get Turned into a Newt!" Giggle, Well as you know, we, as witches, do not really turn people into newts . . . or do we? Hmmmm? Giggle. Yet, there are proper ways of dealing with witches and things that are acceptable and things that most definitely are not. I thought to go over a few of the basics for you here today.
Some of these may seem to be common sense, some not as obvious, but I assure you, each and everyone has been one I have personally experienced in my over 30 years of being a practicing witch. Keep in mind, a witch that is able to help you, give you her magickal advice, tell you a bit about your future or aid you in some magickal way, be it with a charm, a spell, or a potion or other magickal recipe, it is a gift of herself (or himself, but for this discussion I will use the female gender), and as such should never be taken for granted or trivialized.
Should that happen, should you disrespect, take for granted or trivialize her favors and gifts offered to you, you will find that the witch that used to be there for you is no longer to be found, as she has no need for your attention, gratitude or favors. She is an entity of herself and of the Divine, of Nature and of the Universe. She will simply move onto other's more deserving and put you aside. A true witch has no need or desire for revenge, or payback or even the attempt to show you up as she is above such childish nonsense that mere mortals play with. She will simply be gone, or if a friend or family member will no longer talk about what she does and her services will be shut off.
So, to be sure you stay on the right side of your witch, be it the witch at your local witch shop, or a friend who may be a witch or even the witch in your family, the following are some guidelines by which to follow to keep things pleasant and to keep her smiling her favors upon you, should you wish for her to do so:
- Should you have a relationship/friendship with a witch where she chooses to share her gifts with you, such as dreams she may have about you, visions she sees about your future, tarot readings she does for you without charge, or any other service, these need to be respected and never taken for granted.
- A witch also needs to be compensated for her services, and not necessarily with money. Even if she offers you her services for free, a gift, or a small token of your appreciation is always appreciated. Taking her to lunch, flowers, a pretty bauble are all acceptable tokens of your appreciation. A witch enjoys a bunch of wild picked St. John's Wort herb, or an unusually bent tree branch that could be made into a wand as much, actually more so than money or diamonds.
- You can also, with her permission, tell others about her services so that they may come and she can charge them for a tarot reading or make a potion for them for charge, as even a witch needs to pay her bills. Sending her clients is always a good way to say thank you.
- Also, it is never acceptable to ever trivialize, denigrate (make fun of, sully, or tarnish the reputation of) to her face or especially behind her back, as a witch will always find out. Always. And the favors you may have enjoyed will be taken away from you, never to be granted again, or if they are to be, they will be so only with much apology and work to regain her trust. But most times that simply will not be possible.
- A witch has no need for anyone or anything, as she is capable of creating that which she needs in this incarnation. She loves completely and unconditionally those closest to her, she is fiercely loyal, she will defend those she cares about to the bitter end and she expects like treatment. Especially as the shadow of the burning times still remains in our ancestral memory, never to be forgotten. So many were betrayed during those black days, so many murdered. To be trusted by a witch today, to have one willing to work with you, is a gift. Should you be so foolish as to lose it, to betray that trust, then it may well be lost forever.
- Never touch a witches items, magickal tools, books, crystals, stones, jewelry, altar or any special magickal items without her permission. That can bring a wrath down upon your head that you have never experienced before! They may seem insignificant, tiny, glass bottles, filled with unknown items, oils, unrecognizable herbs or ingredients, seemingly of no consequence, but a witch knows what she has, and where she has put things and what they are to be used for, and each has a significance, even if you do not understand it. Never touch, without asking permission and do not be surprised or hurt if permission is not granted.
- One of the most rude, yet sadly most common things some people do when working with a witch, is when asking a question, or getting advice or an answer is to come back with "Really?" Not even realizing,by asking this one word they are expressing doubt as to what the witch just told them. If you are not willing to listen and believe then do not come around and ask in the first place. I have had a few clients who had an annoying habit of always asking "really?" when I would work with them, and that just puts me in the position of trying to convince them, which I will not do. I simply stop seeing them. I have no need nor desire to try to convince anyone of anything. Period.
- This next one follows right on the heels of the last rule when working with a witch. And again, it sadly happens far too often for my liking. This is typical of people who are not familiar with the witch and they come to her for a tarot reading or some other magickal purpose and after a bit of discussion, they will come out with something along the lines of "Well, how accurate are you?" or even as insulting as "Are you any good?" or "Does any of this stuff really work?" Most of us who charge for our services have been doing this for many years, or should have been doing so. It is perfectly acceptable to ask how long someone has been practicing by the way. If someone says a year and you do not feel comfortable paying them, then that is your right. But to ask someone if they are any good, it is an insult of the highest caliber and if you do so, do not be surprised if the witch not only refuses to take your money and give you service but if she shows you to the door.
- This next one is a very important one to be aware of. If you know a witch, whether personally or by reputation, and you see her at a gathering, party or some event, it is absolutely not appropriate to ask her to do something 'magickal' for you, in the attempt to entertain you. She is not there for your amusement, nor are her talents meant to amuse or entertain you or your friends.
- One additional thing I will add to this list and it is a personal pet peeve of mine, so it may be different for others. I find it very difficult when others who I have just met a moment ago, who might have just walked into my store, and they ask me "So how did you get started in all of this?" or "How did you realize you wanted to be a witch, or how did you start on the witch path?" or something similar. Well, to them it may seem like a simple question, but it is far from that. In truth, this person who I just met and do not know at all, has just asked me one of the hardest and most intimate questions anyone could ask me. There is never an easy, pat answer. How I discovered this path, How I started being interested, how I got to where I am today would fill a book if not more than one, so it is simply not something I am able to or comfortable explaining to a complete stranger in a matter of a few minutes.
- In conclusion, we are witches year round. Yet, there are those who like to seek us out around Halloween time, for that small time of the year we are reluctant celebrities, at least I am. I simply do not get it, but every year, we have people come to the store who claim to be my closest friend, one year a woman came in claiming to be my sister's closest friend, and I know my sister's closest friend and I had never seen this woman before! For some reason there seems to be a need to have an association with a witch this time of year, so we smile, we understand and we go along. But then Halloween passes and we are still witches doing our thing come Christmas, or to us Yuletide, and during the dark of winter, and during the blossoming of the springtime, all around the Wheel of the Year. We work our magick quietly and without fanfare, gently creating needed change for the better. Many are not even aware we are here and doing what we are doing, but that's okay. We have been here before time was recorded and will be here after all is done.
© 2010-2017 Faith M. McCann. Portions of this blog posting may include materials from my book “Enchantments School for the Magickal Arts First Year Magickal Studies.” For more information, see www.enchantmentsschool.com or go to the title of tonight's discussion and click, it will link you to my school's website. Please note that the copying and/or further distribution of this work without express written permission is prohibited.
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